Global Impact (WFI) Updates

It’s been one of those months when I have to look at the calendar to remember what happened. No major extended events, but lots of “daily life” happenings apart from WFI. That’s a good thing. It’s given me time to think and work toward what is coming up: next summer and the whole application process, how we want to refine our preparation and incorporate what we learned from this past year, asking the Lord what He has to say about it all. On top of that, WFI has been undergoing some upper-level leadership transitions, so it was definitely a good time to just be home and in one place. It’s also given me a chance to take care of things I’ve been putting off, like car repairs. Definitely grateful for registered Starbucks cards and a Starbucks right next to the auto shop!

Hanna-Barbera's Tom & Jerry

Lucasfilm's Star Wars

I try to keep everything nice and neat and organized, but He seems to delight in blurring the lines and making a mess. For those of you who are a little familiar with art terms, it’s like I’ve been trying to use spot colors while He has been insisting on continuous tone. I have to admit, though, continuous tone imagery is much more realistic and life-like while spot colors are more like old-school animations. Think Hanna-Barbera vs. Lucasfilms, or Tom & Jerry vs. Star Wars, and you’ll get the picture. By the way, I am very aware Star Wars is not real life.

As soon as I got back from Europe at the end of last month, I began the process of getting ready to return to Japan for 12 days through a different, relief/mercy-focused mission. I had been trying to reconcile and justify pursuing two separate mission ministries until He reminded me the compartmentalization is on my end, not His. He is not at all confused. I don’t need to understand it all, but I know that each one supports the other, and it’s all in line with His global heart. I don’t need to justify His assignments to me; I only need to follow and worship Him in the process. So thankful for — and a little overwhelmed by — how He is bigger than I can comprehend, yet He still invites me to participate in His purposes!

He has also been showing me how important it is to be a part of the Body of Christ. There have been some discouraging moments in the past month, but He has never failed to immediately bring someone (and oftentimes more than just one!) to encourage me with His truth and Presence. It’s really been amazing how timely His words through others are! For those of you who have followed that nudge by the Holy Spirit to minister His strength to me, thank you!!

The main theme I’ve been sensing for this next season — not just for WFI, but also for my life — is Psalm 37.4 and the idea of desire. I actually pictured it some time during the beginning of this year, but just let it sit in the back of my mind while focusing on Perspectives and our 2011 summer season. A couple of months ago, the Lord brought it back into the forefront through a conversation with a friend. We were discussing Psalm 37.4 and how God changes our desires as we grow closer to Him when, suddenly, it felt like He introduced a paradigm shift in my understanding of that verse.

Always true to Himself, He has been blurring the lines for me in this. What He was proposing for my personal relationship with Him was what He had already set for work, and those are not two separate issues for Him. Especially in the midst of a stewardship sermon series at my home church, He is challenging me to go beyond tithing 10% of finances to 100% surrender of everything I hold dear, including my desires. He will then not only change them, but fundamentally replace them. The primary shift in understanding was not about what I want, but who owns my wants. Just as my financial accounts are no longer mine once I chose to follow Him, neither are my desires; they come from Him, and He is sovereign to give and take them as He sees fit. Even “work” or “ministry” is not just about 40 hours a week; it is integrated into my entire life. This is not to say there aren’t healthy boundaries! Sabbath rest is just as much a part of work and ministry…again, He has ruined my color-coded calendaring system.

I’m just beginning to learn and explore this. Most books — even Christian ones — will probably darken the lines and enforce the walls between the compartments, encourage a time-management system and formula, to achieve our desires and goals. That’s probably wise, but not what I think God is after in me right now. I’m not sure how this will work out, and one day, I just might end up returning to a more systematic approach to my life-at-large. I know I still need to maintain some semblance of an organized system for mission mobilization! For now, though, I think I’m supposed to allow for some emotional and conceptual messiness as I dive into this journey of desire (yes, I’m familiar with the book by John Eldridge). In the bigger picture of life and my view of God, I feel He has been challenging me to allow more space for wonder, mystery, and even confusion over how He can hold it all together when I don’t fully understand the parts. Basically, I think He’s challenging me to let Him out of the box of my limited understanding…not because He is limited by me in any way, but because in trying to limit Him, I am trying to play God. That is never OK with Him.

My prayer as I head off to Japan and into this next season of ministry is that I pursue God, not goals. If anything, my hope is for those goals to get me closer to God. May we always remember we are called not to a mission or a ministry or a vocation, but to God, Himself, who is our greatest desire.

Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart. Psalm 37.4